Pink-slipped by society

I recently received my pink slip from society:

“Thank you for dedicating your ovaries, your boobs, your overall physique, and your sanity for the sake of your marriage, your children, and vis-à-vis society.

Thanks for working all day at a job and nurturing the kids, so they become productive members of society.

Thanks for taking on much (if not all) of the household chores, food prep, errands, the school involvement, and for working countless hours a week on top of your day job.

Thanks for taking care of everyone when they were sick, even though you were usually sick at the same time.

Thanks for being the best mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, and employee you could be (far from perfect, but within your particular capabilities).

But now your children are (or almost are) raised, productive, tax-paying members of society. Your marriages have at least a 50% chance of being over thanks to infidelity, alcoholism, the passing of your spouse, technology, being an older woman in a young woman’s world, and/or social media. If you are still married, you are likely analyzing who you were, who you are becoming, and how that affects the future of your marriage.

Now that your ovaries are farting dust, your hair is sewer-rat gray, your face is giving over to the Earth’s gravitational pull, you constantly need some form of corrective lens, and the scale is forever waving a middle finger at you no matter what you do, consider this your pink slip…

You will now be summarily ignored and diminished in the eyes of society, perhaps even your partner, and certainly the workforce.

Thanks again – now, if you could just quietly go somewhere and tend to a garden until it’s time for YOUR dirt nap, that would be great.”

Paulina Porizkova feels invisible?

For a minute, I thought menopausal hormones fueled the above sentiment until I started visiting with my friends – who all said the same thing, “Here is what’s happening, and it’s f*cked up.” Even celebrities who have long been celebrated and adored by the masses feel this way. For example, Paulina Porizkova went on Dr. Phil to explain that she feels invisible at almost 58 years old. She looks like this in a swimsuit:

Image via Instagram, paulinaporizkov

This sentiment of being invisible at menopause and midlife wasn’t just mine. It wasn’t just my friends. It was a SUPER MODEL’s sentiment as well. So if Paulina Porizkova feels invisible, what the hell chance do the rest of us have?

What chance does the female population, aged 45 and over, have to be seen and heard and not turned out to pasture like some aging mule that everyone loves but no one has the heart to put down?

We have a chance to all stand in the same space, raise a hand and say, “Hi, yeah, me in the back. I have something to say. I’ve spent the first THREE F*CKING DECADES of my adult life giving my personal best to make society a better place, so NO, Society, you don’t get to avail yourself of our youthful efforts and then tell us to get lost. We are here to be SEEN TOO.”

Woman raising her hand

A love letter to our daughters

That’s why I started another publication at this age (52). This magazine is a love letter to our daughters. We’ll do our part to flip the script on midlife and menopause so when our daughters reach this age, they can stomp into the second half of their life with the confidence and recognition they have earned and deserve. We want society to do the right thing after greedily availing itself of our best efforts for 30+ years – SEE US. HEAR US. In the immortal words of Dave Chappell, “It’s revolution up in this bitch.”

Here’s the excellent news fellow-menopausers, daughters, friends, and whatever brave men are curious or caring enough to learn more about this time in a woman’s life:

In so many ways, life is just starting – something we will cheerfully and continually unpack in this magazine. So if you were impressed by the first 30 years of our adult lives, LOOK OUT.

Paulina’s admission forced me behind the wheel of a car that had been idling for way too long – I strapped in, opened the sunroof, dropped that f*cker in gear, and pushed the gas to the floor. Seen Too was born.

Become part of a community

So welcome to the second half of your life, Scene Two, or in this case, Seen Too. Join us as we explore all the unprecedented challenges and phenomenal benefits of being middle-aged, peri-menopausal, menopausal, and post-menopausal. Bring your sense of humor, your “Yeah, gurl” attitude, and join a group of women who are ready to redefine the prevailing ugly characterization of women at midlife and menopause.

With all the love and light the world has to offer,

Kat Hobza, Founder Seen Too Magazine™

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